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Mar. 13th, 2006 07:47 pm day long fast .........

An experience of its own kind......
a day long fast having nothing but a bottle of water......!!!!.....religion ....... not really ....for a reason I defined for myself!!

Didn't trust myself to pull through the day .... but a whole lot of determination is all that i needed I realised and the constant remainder of the reason why I was fasting ....!!!!!

The day ends and I am as glad as glad can be ..... hopefully will pull through the night also......

Wonder if that's the way people generally fast ..... or is it religion that keeps them going!!!

Current Mood: happyhappy

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Feb. 28th, 2006 04:10 pm change is the only thing constant in life ........

This itself being ironical........ if its change how can it be constant...... and if it is constant , how can it be a change..... but that's precisely wut it is!!!

Life is beautiful because changes keep happening..... some small.... some impacting life in a big way....some leaving you entirely changed .....some to make u gladder...... some to make u sad....its how one reacts to these changes that decides how deeply one's life is affected by them.....


People change, circumstances change , opinions change, seasons change, day changes to night and back again......When people u knew very well or perhaps assumed you knew well change and you can't understand why, it leaves one amazed... situations when change so as to condusive to you leave u happy...... if the other way around.... leave you sad..... opinions you held just a while ago .... seem to lose meaning.......

Must u be unaffected by all changes or its these very changes that make u grow and expand more as the person u r....

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Feb. 15th, 2006 12:23 pm does distance matter..........

well ........ held the opinion that as long as you are bonded in heart....... physical distance hardly matters..... but guess it does make a difference sometimes.....

A very close and dear friend is beginning a new chapter in her life, wish as much I may to be with her, to be part of all her happiness, to just be there with her , I can't!!! ...... its little consolation to know that its because of my very decision that I am not there..... and best of my wishes are always there for her ..... the fact remains that I am not where i should be right now!!!!!

Never did we think that on imporatant occassions in each other's life , one might not be able to be present for the other .......

Guess practicalities of life do put limitations to the way you want things to be .......

Current Mood: sadsad

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Feb. 14th, 2006 03:54 pm woman dear woman.......

How ever much a woman might be educated , liberated and making a place for her self, vulnerable she always remains....

And its really sad to realise that the epitome of love, care and sensitivity could be handled with so much of roughness and insensitivity....!!!However much we talk of development and liberation and equality , they all remain mere words and on papers...... the situation remains just as grave.....

It pains to know that she can be brought down from the pedestal of veneration to that of a mere object of desire......

Wonder how anybody could derieve pleasure from inflicting pain on another soul... ruin life by your action and live in peace.....take control of another life and play with it the way you like!!!!

Current Mood: sadsad

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Feb. 13th, 2006 05:01 pm marriage?????????

Two of my close friends are at an important threshold in life...... one has got married recently and the other is going to be engaged!!!!!..... As a good friend I am supposed to be all happy and gay for them..... but no...... all I can feel is weird , strange , scared, just out of place and uncomfortable with the whole thing....

Have come to understand a few things though......

Marriage is not necessarily about falling in love and knowing that this is "the one" I wanna spend my life with.... its more of a very consciuosly and well thought about decision after taking into consideration lots of practicalities of life.....

Most people seem to look at marriage as a stage in life..... an important step though they all agree .... but as something which necessarily has to haapen in everyone's life......

There is nothing as the right time or the right age to marry.... u find the right person (provided there actually exsits someone like that which I doubt!!!!)..... no time is too early.... but if u r not fortunate enough to, then do end up convincing urself that XYZ is the right one!

Appreciate the beauty of relations that do not fit into the conventional defintion of what a relation should be......they bring more peace and happiness into life.....

Current Mood: blankblank

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Jan. 24th, 2006 09:34 am cosmetic world!!!!!!

What makes me most uncomfortable and totally unable to deal with ..... faces with all false masks on them!!!!!! .... When you are aware of the ill feelings within but pretend to be the best of friends !!!!

People with whom you've had heated arguments, felt insulted, hurt and humiliated throughout the day ..... you end up talking amicably in the end of the day... you smile and laugh with them when your heart is not ..... you are being nice when you are not feeling nice.....

hmmmmm........ so how did I land up in this situation.... do I ever need reasons to create trouble for my own self... and that's what I did once more ..... looked forward and was enthusiastic about something which I should have known is not something I am going to be comfortable with.... in a room full of pretence , it was the presence of just one person which brought solace... who gave me the strength and will to endure it all!!!!!!!!

Lesson learnt hard....... but well learnt... will never plan for something which I am not meant for!!!!!

Current Mood: sadsad

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Jan. 18th, 2006 04:50 pm delusions...............

We live in such a world of illusions!!!!.....

wut looks like a beautiful palace from the outside is nothing but a really dirty and pathetic place from inside.... uninhabitable !!!!

a fascade is what we all put up....... for what...... to protect our vulnerablity ........ or to look all goodie goodie to the world!!!!!!

Such world of hypocricy is not anyone likes to stay in i am sure..... then y is it that we've the need to put up a face that's not real!!!!!!!

Current Mood: disappointeddisappointed

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Jan. 17th, 2006 05:54 pm food not all that necessary for survival??????

Fasting is something which is very much part of all cultures world wide ....... the extent n type of fast varies.... have seen friends fast ..... but do they do have some kinda intake of food which are specially termed as 'food while fasting'...... but yesterday was amazed to find out that its possible to fast for 8 continuous days ....... having just water....... n that too by kids of 10 n 12!!!!!!!!!

Something which I perhaps can never even dream of doing!!!!

Made me wonder if its all mental strength and will power..... wud definitely like to try mine sometime!

Current Mood: amusedamused

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Jan. 16th, 2006 06:00 pm fleeting thots................

Being unreasonable is wrong ........ but there are times when your irrationality takes over and u r angry with someone like hell ..... the anger itself takes a toll on u ..... but the realisation that ur cause of anger is unjustified but still u r unable to pacify urself ..... !!!!!! .....

U define ur own rules generally ..... but there are times when the fact that there is some other X involved and so u have to think of wut W, Y , Z think or feel abt the same and u've to act in a particular way so that X is not affected / hurt by W, Y , Z's reaction....!!!!...... where are ur rules gone then!!!!!! ..... have do so many external factors influence your life!!!!!

Life would be so much easier if you knew what exactly is the right thing to do ... and did the right thing too always!!!!!!!

The moon which looks breath-takingly beautiful in the night sky and seems to loose all its sheen when seen during daylight ..... does that mean beauty is subjective to the back drop?? ..... are people also at their best when with the right kinda people!!!!!!

Current Mood: contemplativecontemplative

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Jan. 15th, 2006 01:06 pm music..... n myself

There was a time when music put life into my soul..... it was just those two hours in the weekends when I could feel entirely alive ...... how eagerly I used to wait for those two hours to be completely at peace with myself....

But now my soul seems to bring life to what i sing..... n it feels heavenly!!! ...... don't know what has brought about this change .... am too scared to etch it down in words ....

All I know is I've been able to lay the ghosts of the past to rest finally ...... n feel life again!!!!!!!

Current Mood: happyhappy

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