..

Wonder when was the last time I really enjoyed every second of a movie and came out of the theatre with a wide smile .... a smile that is lingering even after a week of watching the movie.....

That's the kind of impact "lage raho munna bhai" had on me !!!!!

I simplyyyyy lovvvvvvvvveeeeeeeeeeeeeddddddddddd the movie!!!!!

The movie which is a wonderful blend of comedy and thoughtfulness.The artists carried themselves beautifully ,the plot unfolded very sensibly and there was not a moment when you find your attention going astray...

I won't say I am a gandhian follower nor do I hold anything against him ...... but the way his priciples are portrayed in the movie in a non preaching way does make one appreciate them and give a thought as to whether they can be actually applied to one's life.

The 2 odd hours that the movie lasts makes you come out with a lighter heart and an urge to do some serious thinkng....

Current Mood: happy

discussions are something I always look forward to..... that too with someone I love.... just makes my day.... one such today with a very dear friend.... mostly when we both realy discuss something , we stand on opposite poles and end up arguing..... but today it was really nice to see that we could agree on things and still discuss for really long!!!!!

Topic:
how orthodox people can be and where do u put a stop that all the practices that have been followed for years and you know that they longer make sense....

every religion has its own set of pratices which are out dated today or have been proved to be scientfically wrong..... in such a case is one supposed to follow them blindly just bcoz we've been asked by our elders to do so .... and if not u end up hurting them ... or are u supposed to sit and reason it out with them .....

I myself have seen myself following stuff which make no sense to me but have been taught and have been doing for so long that its now kind of impossible to give them up.....my belief.... as long as a practice does not harm anyone in any way , its ok to follow..... but if it seems totally irrational and amounts to huting someone's ego or self respect , it seems resonable to fight agaist them.......

On my way to office happens to be a school.......
And the sight of those little kids just sets the tone right for me to look forward to yet another beginning of a new day..... just seeing them involved in various activities brings back fond memories........

The assembly which I used to hate from the bottom of my heart then , the PT classes,the march past drills, the hectic rehearsals for annual day , the class room sessions ..... such beatiful days they were .... when each day was something new to look forward to.....

i distictly remember one assembly which I guess I'll never forget the rest of my life.......

Our house was on duty and it was the first day of the month..... though I had made sure that all the people who were to do the prayer, thought and the news were well prepared...... but destiny didn't want things to happen fine I guess.......

The girl who had to say the prayer forgot lines in between( still wonder how one can forget wut we've been saying for years .... nervous perhaps she was!! )).... the news was not up to the mark...... and my princi was noting it all.......and after the assembly..... a big blast from her ..... both to me and my house teacher..... in front of the whole school...... still wonder how I controlled those big tears of mine which were just waiting to flood out...

Worked really hard the whole month to make sure that nothing went wrong like the fateful day again ..... and our house did manage to get the higest score for assembly for that quarter..... and I could see that ' I knew you could do it " look on my princi's face ..... but if only she had gone up the stage and said so , the way she had blasted me!!!!! .....


And those PT classes to miss which we used to scout for all kind of excuses ....... headaches , stomach aches and all the possible ailments our creative minds could cook up...........

March past was something I kind of used to like .... it gave a sense of discipline and immense co-ordination and an army kinda feel which I've always liked.....

Annual day rehearsals was the part Im loved the most...... no attending classes and how the whole day flew without realisation of time ....be it dance, singing, plays or back stage work .... it was all so much fun..... the whole school seemed to be reeling under the enthusiasm

And yes the beginning of the academic year was also so much fun...we seniors were supposed to go to the junior wing and help the teachers there manage the new- to-school kiddies ..... trying to get accustomed to what school was like..... away from the shelter of their homes and their mamma... such cutie pies they all were ....sometimes crying...... talking in their own kiddish lingo......

And then loads of those inter house competitions..... science exhibitions ......chart preparations for display boards..... school life is always so very bustling with activities.....

Some day I have to part of a school I am sure.....

Current Mood: happy

A very common sight I should say .... but stirred strong feelings in me for the first time ......
people moving out in a hurry out of office to catch their buses and be back home to be with their loved ones.....

Some faces showing contentment after a days's good work, some mentally recollecting the tasks to be done once they are out of office .....some just too tired to think of anything, some excited about how they are going to spend the rest of their day ..... in short most of them looking forward to something that's to come ........

But youngsters specially the unmarried lot without their kith and kins really near them, those who stay close by the office don't seem to have anything much to be bothered about...their lives seem to revolve just around the monotonous circle of office and back to the place u sleep the night ..... because not much of a home it is ..

Guess only when u r away from home u realise what it is to be home and have someone waiting for you out there after a hard day's work....

Current Mood: tired

Although I am the eldest in the family and among the senior once even in the extended family , I seldom don the big sister's cap....... being authoritative and commanding is just not me I guess ...... but sometimes when I do, I really like the role .......

My sister-in-all-ways is off to an alien land for about a month and half .... so loadsa preparations for her going .....

Though there was a tinge of sadness to be parting with her for such a long time , taking over the responsibility of getting everything right for her journey was more .... a checklist of all that is to be bought for her travel, off on a big shopping spree.... ( my!!! both of us together found it very difficcult to carry the huge amount of stuff we had bought!!!!)) ..... packing .... setting everything in the right place ..... and making sure that nothing was missed out ..... a herculean task it is I should say !!!! ..... a feeling of contentment but by the end of it each never and muscle was crying out loud for rest!!!! ... most of the times she's the one who takes up my responsiblity..... but for once reversal of roles was fun!!!

its gonna be very different with her gone and that too to a land with difference in time zones ...... not being able to share every minutes' happenings with her ...... but I guess the bond which we share is strong enough to transcend it all..........

A good friend moves towards a new life ........ someone i've always appreciated for the kinda knowlegde he has , respected for the human being he is ....... and generally liked the kinda person he stands for .... but the apprehension and doubts with which he was moving makes me a little unhappy..... had he been going with a little more enthusiasm , I would have been really really glad for him .....

Made me think if any of us really know what we want in life ...... whether there is something we want dearly in life and pursue it with all zeal ... and be content when we have it in the end .... there always seems to be want for more .... and apprehension and doubts about has been achieved ....

All these thots still lingering in my mind , I meet another person who pursued wut he wanted with single minded determination and achieved his goal and has every right to be glad , proud and happy about it!!!!

Don't know if its all about knowing ur mind , defining the right balance of contentment and zeal to achieve something more .......

Current Mood: blank

Awards ceremony in my office .....to honour people who put in a large bit of little bit more than rest of them do.... really really happy for them ..... but could never picture myself doing the same ... sitting all through the night and figuring out why a particular piece of code is not working is not me ....

A task assigned to me ..... I'll make sure that its done and done well.... but to put in extra with zeal n enthu .... at least this is not what would interest me ..... but was just pondering.... if not this ..... there must be something which could hold my interest for long ..... as in keep me engrossed without me realising the passage of time ....

well....... I like spending time with lil kids ..... just observing them I can spend hours .... talking to them .... lissening to their ceaseless chatter ..... able to make sense of their so called senseless talk....

I love talking to people too.... as in kinda know what is it that makes the person that they are ..... their actions, reactions ....and reasons behind them ...... knowing how one can react differently to things .... the variations in thot processes ..... learn from each of them .......

teaching... that's another thing I can put my soul into.... telling someone new about anything that they didn't know before is something i like .... though its only on few occassions that i've had the chance to teach but somewhere it leaves me very satified I have realised.... but this is true for most people I guess........

But don't know if any of them is good enough for making a career out of ...... perhaps I am yet to find "that something " which I can put my heart n soul into .........

Recently read up a post by a favourite blogger of mine about a dino which became six times its size when placed in water for 72 hours!!!!! ...... n the interpretation of the same she had left to the readers.....

Most of the readers equated it to sorrows, tears and unhappiness which seem to grow more you ponder upon them .....

was discussing the post with someone , when that person was like why is it that nobody came up with anything positive about it .....

the first thing that came to my mind was ...... given the right nourishment anybody can grow more than it seems to even themselves that they can .... this person I was talking to adds on.....

The capicity to grow lies within ..... given the circumstances it is within anyone to grow.... and what is noticable is the "change" .... the dino still remains a dino whether big or small...... it is the "change" in its size that draws attention ..... and that change too was not instanteneous ..... it took every minute of 72 hrs for it to grow to the size it did ....the same perhaps is applicable to each one of us ....... every little change that happens is necessary for us to grow as a person ..... it is how well we embrace these changes is what determines what heights we reach in life ....

Motherhood is a blessing... ... bestowed on a chosen few I believe......

And when I hear a a mother say things like .... I regret not having spent more time with my kids .... not having seen them grow and been for them as I would have wanted to ...... bcoz of my hectic career and blah blah blah..... sends my blood boiling.... if that's what was important in life , that's what you should have given complete imporatance ..... why bring in little lives into this world if you do not have it in you to do full justice to your responsibities.....

Its true that in today's competitive world its very difficult to balance both professional and personal life doing full justice to both ..... but bringing up a life and channelising it is a good way is a big responsibility which according to me should not be taken lightly....

I've seen my mother let go of a good career she could have had for us children's sake ..... I 've heard a tinge of regret from her every now and then ..... but then when she looks at the bigger picture it becomes crystal clear that our family would not have been the wondeful one it is today..... had it not been for the big decision to choose family before career that she had taken.... she's the strong thread that binds us all together .... with each of us being very busy with our lives ..... she the common link that keeps us all bound..!!!!!

At the same time I've seen mothers who can balance both very beautifully ...... wonder how .... but that's a rarity......have also seen friends who are totally anti their mother bcoz of their mother not spending enough time with them ..............

Its not for me to say whether one should choose family or career ... its the right of every individual to make ..... but once a decision is taken full justice should be done to it ..... trying to balance urself on both the boats leaves u only dangling .... and trying to hold on to both and not really successful.....

Current Mood: contemplative

Its the festival of coulours again ....... the fun filled holi !!!!!!

Not that i found the festival really nice .... have been various phases when I've felt different things about the festival.... but today the sight of a huge group of little children enjoying themselves the the maximum made me yearn to join then instead of stepping into the office to do some mnotonous coding!!!!! ...... made me remember the times when I as a kid used to enjoy the festival.....

I was introduced to the festival as a very small child ...... the excitement starting from the previous evening....we had holika dehen n a few cultural events in the colony .... I remember one particular year when Mum didn't allow me to drape myself in one of her saris because i had not completed what I had promised to study ( btw holi cumes always at the time when we had exams :( ) ....... remember how I felt as if the whole world had come crumbling down when all my friends were out there n I was enduring punishment!!!!

The next day was rather more fun .... get up early without having to be nagged ...... mix up water n colours n all geared for a fun filled day.... I remember how bhaiyas used to break batteries to remove lead from them n play...... cheeeee!!!!!! ...... when we were really small , we used to be scared of it ...... but over the years we too joined them in their creative efforts..... after loadsa playing we used to return home fully drenched, totally unrecogonisable n exhausted like hell !!!!!! .....

A nice refreshing bath n sleep away to glory ......

Evening was a more sophisticated play of the game with elders ..... and gulal..... and lotsa delicacies...... dahi vade , gujiya....... ymmmmmmmmm........ I remember how my neighbour aunty used to save some specially for me for my love of it ......

those were the days when we used to live as one big whole family!!!!!

Now all of us are in different parts of the world .... walking our different paths .... but I guess this day all of us would dfinitely be remembering the kinda fun we used to have with nostaslgia.......

Then there was a phase wen I used to find the festival really dirty and hence refrain from playing .......

Then a time when I used to feel I am too big for the game but none the less I used to join my sister n her group of friends and have an awesome time with them .... it feels really good when u r pampered for being the biggest in the group !!!!!

And now away from home , away from friends ...... I really dunno if the festival still bears any significance ..... but seeing the small kids did kindle a desire in me ......

But ....... big ppl are supposed to behave professional... so all I got to enjoy today was being reprimanded for behaving kiddish!!!!!

An experience of its own kind......
a day long fast having nothing but a bottle of water......!!!!.....religion ....... not really ....for a reason I defined for myself!!

Didn't trust myself to pull through the day .... but a whole lot of determination is all that i needed I realised and the constant remainder of the reason why I was fasting ....!!!!!

The day ends and I am as glad as glad can be ..... hopefully will pull through the night also......

Wonder if that's the way people generally fast ..... or is it religion that keeps them going!!!

Current Mood: happy

This itself being ironical........ if its change how can it be constant...... and if it is constant , how can it be a change..... but that's precisely wut it is!!!

Life is beautiful because changes keep happening..... some small.... some impacting life in a big way....some leaving you entirely changed .....some to make u gladder...... some to make u sad....its how one reacts to these changes that decides how deeply one's life is affected by them.....


People change, circumstances change , opinions change, seasons change, day changes to night and back again......When people u knew very well or perhaps assumed you knew well change and you can't understand why, it leaves one amazed... situations when change so as to condusive to you leave u happy...... if the other way around.... leave you sad..... opinions you held just a while ago .... seem to lose meaning.......

Must u be unaffected by all changes or its these very changes that make u grow and expand more as the person u r....

well ........ held the opinion that as long as you are bonded in heart....... physical distance hardly matters..... but guess it does make a difference sometimes.....

A very close and dear friend is beginning a new chapter in her life, wish as much I may to be with her, to be part of all her happiness, to just be there with her , I can't!!! ...... its little consolation to know that its because of my very decision that I am not there..... and best of my wishes are always there for her ..... the fact remains that I am not where i should be right now!!!!!

Never did we think that on imporatant occassions in each other's life , one might not be able to be present for the other .......

Guess practicalities of life do put limitations to the way you want things to be .......

Current Mood: sad

How ever much a woman might be educated , liberated and making a place for her self, vulnerable she always remains....

And its really sad to realise that the epitome of love, care and sensitivity could be handled with so much of roughness and insensitivity....!!!However much we talk of development and liberation and equality , they all remain mere words and on papers...... the situation remains just as grave.....

It pains to know that she can be brought down from the pedestal of veneration to that of a mere object of desire......

Wonder how anybody could derieve pleasure from inflicting pain on another soul... ruin life by your action and live in peace.....take control of another life and play with it the way you like!!!!

Current Mood: sad

Two of my close friends are at an important threshold in life...... one has got married recently and the other is going to be engaged!!!!!..... As a good friend I am supposed to be all happy and gay for them..... but no...... all I can feel is weird , strange , scared, just out of place and uncomfortable with the whole thing....

Have come to understand a few things though......

Marriage is not necessarily about falling in love and knowing that this is "the one" I wanna spend my life with.... its more of a very consciuosly and well thought about decision after taking into consideration lots of practicalities of life.....

Most people seem to look at marriage as a stage in life..... an important step though they all agree .... but as something which necessarily has to haapen in everyone's life......

There is nothing as the right time or the right age to marry.... u find the right person (provided there actually exsits someone like that which I doubt!!!!)..... no time is too early.... but if u r not fortunate enough to, then do end up convincing urself that XYZ is the right one!

Appreciate the beauty of relations that do not fit into the conventional defintion of what a relation should be......they bring more peace and happiness into life.....

Current Mood: blank

What makes me most uncomfortable and totally unable to deal with ..... faces with all false masks on them!!!!!! .... When you are aware of the ill feelings within but pretend to be the best of friends !!!!

People with whom you've had heated arguments, felt insulted, hurt and humiliated throughout the day ..... you end up talking amicably in the end of the day... you smile and laugh with them when your heart is not ..... you are being nice when you are not feeling nice.....

hmmmmm........ so how did I land up in this situation.... do I ever need reasons to create trouble for my own self... and that's what I did once more ..... looked forward and was enthusiastic about something which I should have known is not something I am going to be comfortable with.... in a room full of pretence , it was the presence of just one person which brought solace... who gave me the strength and will to endure it all!!!!!!!!

Lesson learnt hard....... but well learnt... will never plan for something which I am not meant for!!!!!

Current Mood: sad

We live in such a world of illusions!!!!.....

wut looks like a beautiful palace from the outside is nothing but a really dirty and pathetic place from inside.... uninhabitable !!!!

a fascade is what we all put up....... for what...... to protect our vulnerablity ........ or to look all goodie goodie to the world!!!!!!

Such world of hypocricy is not anyone likes to stay in i am sure..... then y is it that we've the need to put up a face that's not real!!!!!!!

Current Mood: disappointed

Fasting is something which is very much part of all cultures world wide ....... the extent n type of fast varies.... have seen friends fast ..... but do they do have some kinda intake of food which are specially termed as 'food while fasting'...... but yesterday was amazed to find out that its possible to fast for 8 continuous days ....... having just water....... n that too by kids of 10 n 12!!!!!!!!!

Something which I perhaps can never even dream of doing!!!!

Made me wonder if its all mental strength and will power..... wud definitely like to try mine sometime!

Current Mood: amused

Being unreasonable is wrong ........ but there are times when your irrationality takes over and u r angry with someone like hell ..... the anger itself takes a toll on u ..... but the realisation that ur cause of anger is unjustified but still u r unable to pacify urself ..... !!!!!! .....

U define ur own rules generally ..... but there are times when the fact that there is some other X involved and so u have to think of wut W, Y , Z think or feel abt the same and u've to act in a particular way so that X is not affected / hurt by W, Y , Z's reaction....!!!!...... where are ur rules gone then!!!!!! ..... have do so many external factors influence your life!!!!!

Life would be so much easier if you knew what exactly is the right thing to do ... and did the right thing too always!!!!!!!

The moon which looks breath-takingly beautiful in the night sky and seems to loose all its sheen when seen during daylight ..... does that mean beauty is subjective to the back drop?? ..... are people also at their best when with the right kinda people!!!!!!

Current Mood: contemplative

There was a time when music put life into my soul..... it was just those two hours in the weekends when I could feel entirely alive ...... how eagerly I used to wait for those two hours to be completely at peace with myself....

But now my soul seems to bring life to what i sing..... n it feels heavenly!!! ...... don't know what has brought about this change .... am too scared to etch it down in words ....

All I know is I've been able to lay the ghosts of the past to rest finally ...... n feel life again!!!!!!!

Current Mood: happy